Lead by Example

Yesterday, I participated in a volunteer coach training session for the USTA [United States Tennis Association] Quickstart Program, a fun, age-appropriate way to introduce tennis to kids ages 10 and under.  During the program, we discussed strategies of good coaches––keep things fun, applaud the effort [not the outcome], and so on.  My own family has a “team” of four kids close in age to each other, so many days I feel like a team coach, rather than a mom!  The training session got me thinking; many of the traits of good coaching are also the traits of good parenting.  Effective coaches and parents both lead by example.

 

Your children’s most powerful role models are Mom and Dad.  When your kids see you treat others with kindness and respect, or work through a problem calmly, maintaining a good attitude, your kids are learning positive behaviors on a subconscious level.  Children learn social skills as well as health behaviors by observing the adults in their world.

 

You can talk to your kids about the benefits of healthy nutrition and exercise until you are blue in the face, but nothing makes such an impact as leading by example.  Eat plenty of fruits and veggies yourself.  Now that summer is starting, bring your kids to farmers’ markets in your area and check out the local produce.  Spend time as a family outdoors.  Go on family bike rides, either in your neighborhood or at a nearby bike trail. 

 

Parents’ habits, whether healthy or not, tend to get passed along to children.  In February 2009 a study in the journal Pediatrics showed that parental smoking increased the chances of the kids initiating smoking.  On the bright side of the study, however, the kids of parents who had quit smoking were no more likely to smoke than kids of parents who had never smoked.  Kids emulate and respect parents’ behaviors beyond the grade school years, contrary to the popular belief!

 

One of my 5 year-old twins has adorably been asking to join me on my 2-mile neighborhood runs.  Amazing––a kid his age, asking to run 2 miles, as if it were a treat akin to a trip to the ice cream shop [full disclosure––he asks to go to the ice cream shop regularly, too!].  He’s just a normal kid who simply wants to join his mom in an activity he sees her partake in regularly.

Keep this in mind as you 'coach' your own children.  Your parenting motto should be: "Do as I say, and as I do."