It has been a hectic week for our family, so the other night I decided to take it easy and pop a frozen pizza in the oven for dinner. The timer rang and the pizza somehow broke into two pieces upon removal, resulting in big glops of cheese, sauce, and bell peppers falling onto the oven floor and racks– so much for a painless dinner!
Was I happy about the now-smoking oven? Definitely not! However, my usual audience of 4 kids were watching how I would handle this unexpected suppertime excitement. I decided to laugh about it and call the kids over to watch (from a safe viewing distance) as I attempted to extricate some of the burning cheese blobs. My kids are 7, 5, 5 and 3, so of course they found this entire scenario hilarious. We then rallied together to open as many windows as possible, laughing at the mess Mom made, hoping the smoke alarms didn’t start screeching.
How do children learn to deal with mistakes, disappointment, and difficult situations? During early childhood, Mom, Dad, and other important caregivers model attitudes and coping strategies, whether they are aware of it or not. Keeping this in mind, I consciously chose to take the lighthearted path and joke about the smoking oven.
Despite our best efforts, parents are human and our kids will see us lose our cool from time to time. Do not fret if that occasionally happens– emotions are a part of life. If you’ve found yourself yelling or otherwise exhibiting less-than-model behavior, it is OK to simply talk to your kids about it, explaining that you shouldn’t have used those particular words, for example. Use daily life events and mishaps as illustrative scenarios to help your young children learn to navigate their emotions and maintain their self-esteem, even when things go wrong.
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